it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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