chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
