This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
