I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
