I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I wear drunk well.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize