i was rollin on her like bob the builder
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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