left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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