never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
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