Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
