Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
A bitchslap is in order.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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