I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
