What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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