I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
