He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
