I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
