I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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