Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
