He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left your underwear on the fireplace
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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