drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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