my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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