we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
