just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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