i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize