Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
