Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Randomize
