If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize