fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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