I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
