Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Randomize
