As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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