Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible http://tfl.nu/51ze
  Replies (22) Good night (626) Bad night (2951)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices. http://tfl.nu/oyfa
  Replies (10) Good night (804) Bad night (5639)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen. http://tfl.nu/gj69
  Replies (38) Good night (12836) Bad night (1225)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time. http://tfl.nu/8o43
  Replies (22) Good night (5336) Bad night (1109)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things. http://tfl.nu/e6ox
  Replies (36) Good night (9328) Bad night (1143)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants. http://tfl.nu/k57a
  Replies (21) Good night (1283) Bad night (5269)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD http://tfl.nu/cfey
  Replies (5) Good night (2067) Bad night (872)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language. http://tfl.nu/0hum
  Replies (3) Good night (2702) Bad night (630)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care. http://tfl.nu/7tzw
  Replies (20) Good night (1283) Bad night (4150)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad. http://tfl.nu/6s4w
  Replies (4) Good night (554) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (580): This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting http://tfl.nu/ouax
  Replies (9) Good night (989) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!" http://tfl.nu/tsa9
  Replies (4) Good night (602) Bad night (198)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow. http://tfl.nu/loua
  Replies (3) Good night (641) Bad night (329)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Go christen that room with your naked body.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Go christen that room with your naked body. http://tfl.nu/ofzi
  Replies (0) Good night (589) Bad night (234)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you. http://tfl.nu/8wct
  Replies (1) Good night (346) Bad night (188)

Randomize