carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
