PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize