Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
