wakey wakey hands off snakey
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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