More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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