just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
