Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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