Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
