i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
