Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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