So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
