There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
