I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
