that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
