I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
