hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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