i permit you to call me
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
