Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize