I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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