your room smells of hookers.
And success
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Everything about him screamed your future.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
